Of a Certain Age and Dating: 40 and after the divorce; 50 and suddenly single or never married?

Should we start by watching this cute video and by questioning What Happens to Your Brain When You Fall in Love?  Falling in love is like cocaine?  Wow!

Single.  Friday night and you either have found yourself to be recently uncoupled, have been single for a while and said where has the time gone, or perhaps you are thinking to explore the ykes-eek-get-out-there dating world.  Or, perhaps, so deep in the cave you have not even gotten to the point where you can even think about licking your wounds. And, what about the “How-can-I-even-think-about-dating-when-I-am-parenting-on-a-Friday-Night”? Hence the final blow, has mislabeled misunderstood Incel become

Is Alzheimer's the New It Topic?

Over the past week there have been multiple settings in which dementia overshadowed the conversations.  Ranging from office settings, to in depth phone conversations, to dinner parties, to random running into old friends at the grocery store the discussions centered around Alzheimer’s.  So, if you wish to revisit my past blog about Alzheimer’s and its links to sleep or the phenomenal story of Glen Campbell’s journey through Alzheimer’s as he storytells through music why he’s Not Gonna Miss You it might be worth the review.

Millennials and Their Role Amongst the Generation Gaps

This article What Millennials Say About Their Parents During Therapy  actually speaks for itself.  I have been having frequent conversations with all generations lately.  My conclusion?
Millennials have not been raised in social design of support and structure equipped with tools to be independent and engaged with the world in which we live.  Of the seven items discussed in the article, item number six resonates with me as an observer of all generations [ The Great Generation; Baby Boomers; Generation X'ers; Millennials; Generation Z (iGen)...

Octavia Butler - Science Fiction and Intellectualization

Happy Birthday Octavia Butler - the to wonderously ahead of her future creative goddess. Pasadena's own..

Photo by Bryan Goff on Unsplash

Read more about Dr. Strayhorn's practice and philosophy...

Video-Gaming - the new drug.

Many mental health professionals have recognized video-gaming as an identified clinical problem but now the WHO (no not the rock band from the ‘60’s, but the World Health Organization) have officially taken notice.  Additionally, the United Nations Health Agency is “saying compulsive gaming is a mental health problem.” No Kidding!

Gaming is now classified as a specific addiction disorder such as gambling, or an AOD (alcohol and other drugs). Although these experts are stating that 3% of gamers are addicted I assert that this number is noticeably under representative of the true gaming addiction.  This discussion is nothing new to mental health arenas. If a new symptom or disorder surfaces the industry at large takes a while to identify, research and design strategies and treatment for the disorder.  In this instance, we see the American Psychological Association dragging their bureaucratic and often dinosaurus bones in a 2013 statement about gaming stating “a condition warranting more clinical research and experience before it might be considered for inclusion.”  Inclusion, meaning the DSM V...

Father Day? Daddy Issues? Celebrate or Pass? Sunday June 17, 2018

The Father’s Day Letter to my Estranged Dad presents as a wonderful evolutionary coming of age processing of an adult son’s cathartic reflections of his father-son relationship.  I initially started writing something light and positive but life is not always a win nor effortless. With some life experiences the struggle is part of the achievement.  With this said the Father Archetype is something that I vested six years in study.  All to say, a Ph.D. from a university that specializes in Jungian psychology has left me with an ongoing recognition that I don’t fully understand the symbolic and unconscious meaning of The Father.

There is so much to know and learn about the Father Figure.  Maybe I should have just said it’s complicated and sometimes I struggle to grasp the depth of the true meaning of the Father Figure Archetype.  Love, hate. One is the son and becomes the father. Or chooses not to become the father and a part of that branch symbolically dies? Or does more life go to ...

Divorced Men Who Knew their Marriage was Over - Melancholy or Opportunity to Move On?

Some Warning Signs from a Dominate Energy (Male) Account That The Masquerade is Over.

[If you just want to get to the bittersweet and avoid the reading and accept the final curtain call there is a wonderful song by Nancy Wilson and Cannonball Adderley titled The Masquerade is Over. The jazz standard plays really well in an imaginal scene with a vinyl record player and a gin and tonic, or dry martini.]

I have had male clients who have disengaged with their spouses and were not fully committed to the relationship.  The other group within this client group are the men who were blindsided. Blindsided either by their partner or their own avoidance of the facts presented them.  The writing might have been on the chalkboard but they chose to ignore the screeching sound only to plow through the homework hoping to turn in the assignment desperate to receive a mere passing grade.  

Although I mentioned “male” clients this is primarily a representation of an energy within the relationship more so than let’s say specific gender.  Quite often, ...

Suicide - the Loss of Wonderful Accessories & Digesting the Unknown of Mental Health

This morning was shocking.  Maybe for many it was just an ordinary day.  But for the majority of people I suspect there was this aftershock that was not of the natured earthquake that we Californians become accustomed.  This aftershock was Anthony Bourdain, the embrace all cultures, all hole-in-the-walls, and all foods celebrity chef and noteable star of CNN’s Part’s Unknown.  Suicide at 61 today, June 8, 2018. To receive the news of his death ...

Your 1st Therapy Session and Soon Thereafter - Conclusion

Ghosting the Therapist - We Were Getting it Long Before it was a Thing in Social Media!

I wanted to conclude this discussion from the past several weeks about the 7 Things You Should Know Before Your First Therapy Appointment. One might argue that the clients who are unfamiliar with therapy might not be able to utilize these seven items despite them being a potential for successful initiations to treatment.   Frankly, there are times ...

The Elephant in the Room - and the Spiritual Communal Pinnacle

I started the discussion April 13, 2018 about The Elephant in the Room - Adolescents can be wedges!  During these past five writings we utilized 5 Scientifically Proven Ways to Raise Happier Kids as an effective tool to start the conversation on how children can cause challenges in the communication and overall flow of the primary relationship - the two partners.  I will term two people as partners which is inclusive of married couples, domestic partners, and any union which is defined as a partnership as the people define it (This is an open definition that morphs and changes as poly-fluidity, polyamorous can be ...